Episode 25: Surviving the Parkland Shooting: A Father’s Story.
It is every parent’s nightmare: a mass shooting where your child attends school. For Jeffrey Kasky, the nightmare became a reality on Valentine’s Day in 2018 when two of his sons became survivors of the Parkland shooting. Cameron and Holden Kasky were attending Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School when a former student carried a semi-automatic rifle into the school and killed 17 people and injured 17 others. Jeffrey relives the story of that day, how his son Cameron became a spokesperson for the students and co-founder of the March for Our Lives and how his family is doing today.
Jeffrey is the father of 4 children: Julian, Cameron, Holden and Conner. On February 14, 2018 he was working on his computer at home when he got a text message from his friend Steve Wind (Alex Wind) asking if he saw what was happening at school. Jeffrey turned the tv on just in time to see a helicopter shot of the his children’s school. The tv new was speculating that there was a shooter but had no further details. Jeffrey immediately texted his son Cameron to find out what was going on. After a very long wait (message system was overwhelmed at that point), he heard from Cameron. Cameron and Holden were together in a classroom and safe!
Cameron had made his way to get his brother from class. Holden is on the autism spectrum and attends special classes so twice a week, Cameron would get his brother and take him to his last class of the day (Drama). Normally, they would walk straight to the theater room, but on this day the fire alarm went off and a teacher instructed them immediately to come into her room. Had they not listened to her request, they would have walked through the deadliest area of the school right at the time of the shooting.
They entered a room where some of the most developmentally disabled children attend class and had to shelter in place for several hours. It was a challenge to remain quiet in the room, NOW THIS did a video with Holden and Jeffrey describing the experience that day:
When the police entered the classroom, Cameron was able to explain that this class had special needs and the children were safely removed from the room. The boys had been in the classroom the whole time and were removed without having to witness the murder scene and the bodies.
As this is happening, Jeffrey in bumper to bumper traffic on his way to the school. After several hours, he made his way to his ex-wife’s house in Parkland. She was on a cruise and called to ask if she should helicopter back immediately but Jeffrey told her to stay put. He was in continual but delayed text communication with Cameron and was told that the children were making their way to a local Marriot. As Jeffrey was driving to the Marriot, he was told by a friend that there had been 7 deaths, not the actual 17.
Cameron was unaware at the time that he lost a good friend in the shooting. Jeffrey says that he has never spoken to Cameron directly about the loss because there are just some things that are not discussed with the group of survivors and this teacher’s death is one of those topics.
Cameron and Holden were allowed out early because Holden’s special needs. When Jeffrey picked them up, the boys were starving so they stopped at WaWa and grabbed food. They then went home and Cameron went in his room to write the now famous Op-Ed (“Never Again”) that CNN picked up the next day. We asked if Jeff thought that it might have been too raw at that time for Cameron to write down his thoughts. Jeffrey explains that Cameron has always been an advocate, a moment such as this catapulted his ability to make a difference.
The next day, Cameron started assembling a team of survivors. David Hogg, Alex Wind, Emma Gonzales, Jaclyn Corin and a few other children formed a group with Cameron. The kids began to speak out. Jeffrey explained that the challenging time was amplified by the fact that Cameron is Bipolar. He was working around the clock and to the point of exhaustion.
The Kasky family has had many death threats and their house has been swatted. Jeffrey was concerned for Cameron’s physical well being as well so he made sure to travel with Cameron for most of the media and preparations for the March. That was not always an easy task. Jeffrey explained what was most traumatizing for him was trying to deal with Cameron because all of students had isolated away from any adults including parents and were not communicating with them. Their philosophy was that the adults screwed this up and thereby, would not be trusted or be a part of the planning. Jeffrey was finding out plans by outside parties and had to go to Cameron and explain that he would be coming with him, that he was a minor and could not travel alone. It was a battle every single time.
Jeffrey and some of the parents formed a group to supervise the kids, but that was not easy. They were not allowed in the room as the children were planning media and events, but would go along with them to speaking events. Once celebrities got involved, the parents took a more active role because there was a great deal of money coming in that needed to be processed correctly.
Jeffrey explains that these kids were not seeking the spotlight. They used the media to promote their cause and were very calculating in which child spoke to which media. They brilliantly turned the tables to further their movement. Thousands of letters of support continually came in for the children. The kids were in charge of this movement and what it promoted.
When Cameron wrote the Op-Ed, he called it Never Again. Jeffrey was concerned with the title for several reasons but the mostly because he knew that a school shooting would happen again, and again and again. Cameron explained that his intent with “Never Again” meant that the reaction to another shooting would not never be the same again.
The group also had to play the game of timing with the NRA. They were told it was too soon to talk about the shooting so they timed the March for one month after. March of Our Lives soon became a reality and a rally on Washington, D.C..
With the Capital in the background, the students and hundreds of thousand of others attended the rally.
The March for Our Lives did not mark the end of the movement; it continues through today.
Many of the children didn’t go back to school, they finished high school online. They don’t communicate as they once did, life and college has led them on separate paths. Jeffrey explains that Cameron has been so busy that he is only taking marginal care of his personal health.
The group will always be defined by this event. When the shooter goes on trial, it will be a reminder. Every anniversary will be a reminder. Jeffrey’s mission is spread the truth of this tragic event and make sure it doesn’t happen again. The parents and children did not choose this but they will always try to make a difference because of it.
Thank you Jeffrey Kasky for your honesty and candor in this interview. If you found any of this difficult, please remember there are mental health resources for support.
Stay tuned for Jeffrey to come back and talk about the autism community and how the rates of diagnoses have recently increased.
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